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Becoming a caregiver or playing a more active role in another’s healthcare is a big responsibility. At some point, almost all adults will support an aging parent or a loved one in need. Keeping track of their needs and wellbeing, while also prioritizing your own can become overwhelming. It’s important to know: you are not alone, and help is available. Read on for 11 tips to help you manage your time, your own wellbeing and your loved one’s care. Self-care comes first. When your main priority is the person in your life who needs care, it’s easy for your own needs to take the backseat. Give yourself time each day to focus on your personal wellbeing. It’s hard to give a loved one the care they need if your own needs are not met. Prioritize the Activities of Daily Living (ADL). Make a note of what ADLs your loved one can do alone, what they need help with and what activities require the most help. This will help you work through the day with them, as well as plan out how the day’s activities will go. Do a home safety audit. Do showers, bathtubs and steps have safety grab bars? Look around the house for additional tripping hazards, like rugs or electrical cords. If your loved one struggles with day-to-day navigation of the home, consider scheduling an occupational therapy appointment. This type of therapy helps a person develop or maintain the motions required to accomplish daily tasks. You might also qualify for a referral to in-home healthcare, such as Home Care. Have the hard conversation. The best time to discuss views about end of life care and to learn what choices are available is before a life-limiting illness or crisis occurs. With advance care planning, you can help reduce the doubt and anxiety related to decision making at the end of life. Completing an Advance Directive is a great tool to sort out all these decisions before they’re needed. Attend a free workshop to learn more and complete this important document. Identify when you need respite. Respite care involves receiving a short-term break from caregiving. Organizing in-home care for your loved one will allow you to step away and tend to your needs. By identifying what kind of respite care you are seeking, you can find the right person to provide you with that much-needed break. Don’t wait until you feel overwhelmed, plan ahead. Write down insurance contact information. Have a direct connection to the right insurance professional for support and advice. If your loved one is eligible Medicare, this is a good opportunity to review their current selections and if they would benefit from a Medicare Advantage Plan or Medicare Supplement Insurance. Seeking out expert advice or information on Medicare options is a great way to navigate this. Consider calling a broker, or attend a free educational seminar with Senior Care Plus. Gather legal and financial information. Make a list of all existing legal documents and financial accounts that your loved one has. These might include a will, advance directive, power of attorney, bank accounts or investment accounts. If you have questions about how to manage them, or need assistance in setting up additional framework, reach out to a lawyer, legal service, financial adviser or bank representative. Create an inventory of medical information. Identify where all of your loved one’s medical records are, as well as a list of providers or healthcare practices where they have received care. Consider if you should have your loved one give you Proxy Access in MyChart, which allows you to access all the features in MyChart on their behalf, including viewing upcoming appointments, viewing test results and emailing a doctor on their behalf. Make a list of what others can do. Think about all the little (and big) things that need to happen, and write down tasks that others could take care of you. When someone says “let me know what I can do” you’ll be ready with a pre-written list of items they may be able to assist with. Tasks could include tackling around-the-house repairs, scheduling lawn work, helping to walk the dog, taking a car for an oil change and cleaning. Find programs and events for social enjoyment. If and when possible, seek an activity outside of the home. Look for community centers that have programs for seniors, recreational activities or meals that you can patriciate in together. If leaving the home is not an option, arrange for visits or in-home activities, such as movie nights, card games or time to visit with family. Research long-term options. If you will be considering a nursing home or assisted living, make a list of amenities that you and the person you are caring for would like. Take this list with you when visiting potential locations to make sure you don’t forget to ask about each item.

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Shining Brightly We all carry a light inside of us. Some people seem to have a constant glow while others flicker brightly here or there depending on what they’re doing or who they’re with. But for another select group, the light they embody is closer to a sunrise, illuminating and embracing everything and everyone it touches. Do you think that’s a bit heavy-handed or just a writer’s poetic exaggeration? Well, that’s because you haven’t met this issue’s featured Sterling Silver Club member, Tami, yet. But that’s about to change…  This Little Light of Mine  As an infant, Tami’s adoptive parents were drawn to her light, even though the couple had come to an orphanage in Washington state hoping to find an older child to add to their family.  “My parents always said that after seeing and holding me, they had to take me home,” Tami remembers and then smiles. “They also liked to tell the story of how they sold their prize baby bull, Johnny Apollo, to pay my adoption fees!”  Tami has fond memories of making mud pies and climbing trees as a child and feels privileged to have been raised by older parents.  “They both lived through the Great Depression and my dad proudly served in the U.S. Navy in World War ll,” says Tami. “I certainly attribute learning to love and give unconditionally through their humble ways. I had the honor of taking care of them both for about 10 years before their passing. When asked who my heroes are, though I have several, they are at the top of that list for sure.”  Today, Tami is married to her high school sweetheart, Richard. They’ve been together for 43 years and have five children – and 10 grandchildren – of their own.  Helping Others Through Darkness Tami started a highway construction business with her family in 2000, but focused 18 years of her career around her love of teaching, with seven years spent as Vice Principal of Academics at Reno Christian Academy. One of her greatest joys during that time was implementing Prime Time, a program that set aside special time for students who had experienced recent traumatic events. “I used puppets, sewing, crafts – any activity the students would respond to,” explains Tami. “But mostly, I listened.” And when one of her students shared, “I just want someone to listen to me for an hour today” – that’s what she did. “We sat on the sidewalk and ate Fudgsicles and giggled at the silliest things,” Tami recalls with some emotion. “And when we both left smiling, I was reminded that the most beautiful moments are when we are simply present with an open heart.”

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We plan for the birth of a child, weddings and retirement, but rarely do we discuss how we want to be cared for at the end of our lives. Getting through this challenging conversation and completing an Advance Directive can give you peace of mind that your loved ones will not have to make difficult choices on your behalf. The best time to complete an Advance Directive is now – don’t wait until a life-limiting illness or crisis occurs to discuss your views about end-of-life care and to learn what choices are available. By preparing in advance, you can help reduce the doubt and anxiety related to decision-making for your family if you cannot speak for yourself. What are Advance Directives? An Advance Directive is a document that states your choices about medical treatment and names another person to make medical decisions on your behalf if you are unable to. This document allows you to make legally valid decisions about future medical care.  “Completing your Advance Directive is a gift you give your family,” says Director of Palliative Care, Mary-Ann Brown RN, MSN. “The stress associated with these difficult decisions is decreased if everyone knows what is important to you and what you want at the end of life.”

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